Saturday, September 24, 2011

How do I get more control in my life?

By Teppie Chartomatsidis

Do feel like your life is spinning out of control and not going where you want it to go?

Do you feel negative and hopeless when it comes to your future? If you do you’re not alone, many people feel this way.

People who have limited control in life feel stuck like this and don’t have a clue on how to get out of this self defeating situation. While it is only logical to say that we can’t control everything in this universe, as individuals we can exert a considerable amount of control in our own lives.

What are the characteristics and consequences of feeling powerless?

• You take a passive approach to life. You wait for destiny to unfold instead of taking control of your future. As a result you will live an unfulfilling and passive existence and may at times get bitter and jealous at others who succeed.

• You don’t want to confront your problems. When you’re passive you believe it is easier to avoid problems and situations that may involve stress than to confront and deal with them. The danger with this thinking is that it influences you to procrastinate and feel hopeless and helpless.

• Exerting no control over your life makes you feel like a victim of life’s circumstances and external situations. This lack of control makes you vulnerable to the whims and dictates of other people and being controlled by other people can cause a lot of misery in life.

• You wait for others do fix your life for you. You take no or little initiative to improve or change your life. You have this faulty belief that the world should provide you what you need or that you should not suffer or be inconvenienced.  The consequences of thinking like this breeds frustration, depression and despair in your life.

How do I get more control?

If you want to be like successful people who are in control of their lives and are confident of where they are going in life, follow these 6 smart tips:

Be more autonomous

This means that you should become more of an independent person. Strive to become self reliant. You should be the type of person who is able to do things and make decisions without the help of anyone else. If you do need guidance, ask a professional or someone that you trust and look up to or better, someone who has succeeded in life.

Strive to become financially secure In terms of your finances, be the type of person who doesn’t have to rely on others financially. When you have financial independence you feel more confident and you have the power to do whatever you desire in life and don’t need the permission of others.

Become a go-getter

Don’t wait for others to give you what you want on a platter. Take the initiative to go out and get what you want by yourself.

Create your own opportunity

Don’t leave your future to chance. There is no such thing as wishful thinking. Be the type of person who creates their own luck and take action as soon as you have the chance.

Do some problem solving

Ask yourself “What do I need to get more control in life?” Then brainstorm your thoughts on paper and create action steps that will give you more control in that situation. It’s always best to think on paper.

Take responsibility

Start to accept that no matter what has happened in your past you are now 100 per cent responsible for your life. No success happens by chance or accident, it is only created through personal effort.

If you start implementing the above steps in your life, then you will be able to make a big reversal in your life. From feeling hopeless and powerless about life, you will start to become a stronger, happier person, feel more powerful and optimistic about who you are and where you are going in life.


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